Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Meeting Mr or Mrs Right in London

Here we go, my first unpublished article...I should probably stick to blogs!


The evening is about to end, the club is about to shut, you are alone, with your friends, but alone, no ‘conquest’, another lonely night and weekend ahead of you – you are desperate for some affection some contact but you want more than a night of lust. You despair, you panic, but all you meet are the ones out for a one night stand, sex with no string attached, that’s all that some guys want and that’s all that some girls want (sometimes).
The place is full with available people, attractive people, and people that you wouldn’t even share a coffee with, people that you wouldn’t speak to in a million years, but the club is about to close and you are desperate…. It’s a lottery and you gamble and then you wake up on a Saturday morning, in a stranger’s bed, trying to work out where are your shoes, your purse, the nearest station, and even in which part of town you are in.
This is a likely scenario for many of us Londoners lost in a city of lonely souls, in a city of millions of lonely people. Everywhere you see couples, but you wonder how did they meet in such a city, a city where you don’t even know your neighbour’s name.

Meeting the right person is hard everywhere in the world, but especially in London where everybody has such high expectations, such high standards. They have everything - money, careers, friends, but they are missing that special someone, that special person to wake up with on a Sunday morning and with whom they can read the papers in bed. That special connection that you can only have with somebody that gets you – and not everybody gets you, we all know that.

The secret of meeting Mr or Mrs Right in London is to simply stop looking. I know it might sound like a cliché, but it is so true. The minute you start having a full life, and not worrying about whether you will meet that special someone, that’s when you will meet them. The minute you put yourself out there and be who you really are and be confident about yourself, that’s when you’ll hit the jackpot. The way you do it is to feel good about yourself, and that way you do that is to stop caring about whether you are good enough to be loved by anybody, and start loving yourself with all your limitations and insecurities. Someone will love you especially for your insecurities and your weaknesses because they are part of you and they make you who you are, a unique special person. And they make the other person feel that you’ll then accept their weaknesses too, which would really make you quite a catch!

So don’t ever hide them, be yourself and trust always your instinct, even if it goes against everything you have ever believed in. Even if it makes you do things that you’d never do, abandon yourself, forget your shyness, your inhibitions and your worries, and always always know that somewhere out there, there is somebody for you, somebody for everybody. In London especially, or anywhere really, you must believe in yourself and believe that anyone would be lucky to have a person like you, a person so endearing, that anyone would be crazy not to go for.

Where to meet? Anywhere, just smile, look at people in the eyes, be genuine, not too forward but not too shy, that’s the formula. All you have to do is to be fulfilled and have lots of passions and interests and soon you’ll meet somebody that will share those passions with you...or at least you’ll have something to talk about when a cute guy or girl happens to be in your circle of friends.
Of course this all sounds so obvious, but it is not easy to accept yourself fully, I still don't myself, but if you don’t accept yourself, then who would? In terms of my Mr Right, I met him in a bar, of all places, and never I would have thought this would turn out to be the best decision I made to go out that night, that night when I wasn’t looking for anybody, for the first time, that night when meeting someone was further from my mind than ever before.
It started like a bit of fun, but ended up being a marriage, so never assume anything about any situation, because you never know how it’s going to turn out, and that’s the beauty of life, the unknown, the surprise. I hear incredible stories about people that met in a supermarket or on a train, or at a traffic light, just be open to anything at anytime and you will not be disappointed. Ok, you might get disappointed a few times, or many times like I was, but I believe that in the meantime, until you do find someone special, you’d would at least had great fun trying...

6 comments:

Rachel said...

Great article. I don't know how hard I try. I go through my day and just live.
I know that someday I will meet the one. I just wish that it would happen sooner than later.

Erica said...

Thanks Rachel! You are the best!!

Dizzie said...

Love the article!

Even harder to find Mr Right over here. The Swedish men are like the Swedish cars - easily frozen and need a LOT of alcohol to get them running, but then they just get slobbery... :)

Not looking. Hope Mr Right will find me! ;)

Marissa said...

This is a GREAT article! Really. I'm going to try to follow some of your advice -- meeting Mr. Right in NYC is no piece of cake either. Grr! Just finding Mr. Right Now seems impossible! :)

Pam said...

This is great, Erica! I particularly appreciate the message to remember to have fun along the way : )

Erica said...

Thank you all for your comments!